One of the biggest issues in parenting today, especially when children are about to start preschool or when the good weather arrives, is understanding the right time to take off diapers and how to teach parents to be patient and dedicated during this phase.
Therefore, first of all, it is super important to look at the baby or child in front of us, and to be aware that diapers are not removed. It is not a process guided by the parents. Rather, it is undertaken by the child, and it only happens (and it happens very easily without carelessness or major setbacks when the child himself takes this step) when the child reaches a level of sphincter maturity and awareness of his own body, when he can control and wait until he reaches the "correct" place to do his business.
When the process is guided by outsiders, it is common for the child to soil his or her clothes, bed, and perhaps even the carpet and sofa. This process is not at all necessary for families, when they support the child, encourage him or her, and show him or her the process, just as we do when they start to walk, eat, talk, or have teeth. We are there by their side, but we cannot and should not force stages and acquisitions.
Each child takes their own time to potty train and this time naturally varies from child to child.
For children, the time they learn to hold their urine does not always coincide with the time they learn to hold their stool. Likewise, nocturnal urinary continence may coincide with daytime urinary continence or may occur several months or years later.
Potty training usually begins when a child is around 3 years old. However, this should not be dictated by the child's age, as the child must be physiologically and psychologically ready. This timing can vary greatly from child to child.
To know if your child is ready, pay attention to his or her behavior. See if he or she gives you any indication that the dirty diaper bothers him or her, if he or she shows discomfort and disgust or even finds the diaper strange, if he or she shows that he or she wants to urinate or defecate. With these small indications, he or she may be trying to start weaning himself or herself from the diaper. On the other hand, parents must be prepared to dedicate the necessary attention and patience for as long as necessary.
First signs and what to do
To understand whether your child needs to be potty trained, consider the following signs:
- Shows curiosity in seeing parents frequently using the bathroom;
- The child shows interest in the potty or toilet;
- Asks questions about the subject or makes signs when urinating or defecating.
Parents, on the other hand, can encourage and help the potty training process in the following ways:
- Buy a chamber pot or toilet seat;
- Using training pants can be immensely useful when they no longer want the diaper but are not yet ready to use non-absorbent pants;
- Buy underwear that suits the child's taste;
- Always praise the child when he or she learns something new or makes progress in learning;
- Dress the child in loose clothing that is easy to take off;
- Avoid making threats or applying punishments as much as possible.
As soon as the child begins to show signs that he or she is ready to be potty trained, parents should ask throughout the day if he or she wants to use the potty or toilet and give him or her the option to choose. However, parents should be prepared to hear “no” often.
We can remind the child if they need to go pee, we can show them how to do it, what happens in the bathroom, what the process is.
They may ask to go several times, with or without clothes and do nothing, it's natural.
Please note that, to avoid developing constipation and thus delaying potty training, children may not want to defecate in the potty. In this case, it is important that they continue to do their business in the diaper as usual.
Daytime potty training & nighttime potty training
It is generally known that daytime and nighttime potty training require different disciplines from the child. Since daytime potty training takes place when the baby is awake (when he or she is most consciously alert), for this same reason it usually takes less time compared to nighttime potty training.
In turn, nighttime tends to be a little more difficult and time-consuming because it occurs when the child is sleeping.
Do not wake your child to go to the bathroom. Keep the diaper on until it is no longer necessary. The quality of sleep, which is interrupted if parents wake the child, is not recommended.
Potty training with failure
If the child refuses to use the potty or toilet, it is advisable to take a break of between 1 and 3 months. Attempts will be futile if the child is not ready and this will certainly be the most likely explanation for failure in potty training.
However, if several unsuccessful attempts are made to potty train during the day and at night and the child is over 4 years old, it would be ideal for him/her to be observed by his/her attending pediatrician.
